| 琴晚我比KK 輔導......我果一刻真係覺得佢好似完全睇透晒我既內心世界,思想,回憶..... 真係好得意,KK令我唸返起以前既我,雖然我一路以黎都未試過真正咁開心過,但係當我見到人開心,我都會覺得開心..... 當琴晚KK同我講我既問題所在既時候....同時我都唸緊我係呢一刻仲要飄浮到幾時,冇錯,我唔係冇斗心,但係唔知點解個火梗係好細,點整都唔識大,都唔知點解會咁..... 佢同WENDY講,唔好再比我再鑽入去..... 其實我有唸過嫁,我自己係果到究竟做緊D咩...我既方向係點真係唔知... 馬仔話,叫我係到浸2年,一定會拎到自己想要既野,但係我覺得唔係浸唔浸既問題,而係我究竟係果到係想點,係抱住個咩心態...做人係要有目標,有理想,Vanessa同我講,其實我已經有左個目標,只不過係我自己冇信心去接住佢,我其實唔係唔想接住佢,而係我"當日"既信心已經消失左,就算唔係完全消失,都只係得返好似芝麻咁細粒既影像... 講開信心,我就唸起以前,我以前好鍾意畫畫,記得有一次老師教FASHION畫時裝設計圖,果陣我第一次接觸,就好鍾意呢樣野,果陣我真係鍾意到好似傻左咁,不佛咁畫,係咁畫,一畫就畫左好多張圖出黎,我全部送晒比我老師,直至我要被學校踢出校既LAST果一年我都仲有畫,果次係最後一次畫設計圖...其實當中我都有停止過,係因為我老豆既影響.....我真係好憎佢...我果陣好熱愛FASHION,有唸過做一個FASHION DESIGN,我爸爸佢見到我日畫夜畫,有一日就忍唔住話我, 一時冇成,樣樣野唔識,畫咁多圖有咩用,興趣唔可以當飯食,你畫呢D野可以搵到好多錢咩,我叫你讀書又唔見你去努力咁讀,考試成績又唔係話好過人! 之後佢就拎我D畫斯開左幾邊,掉左落垃圾桶到....果陣我真係受左好嚴重既打擊,因為我有細到大都冇真正得到過D咩野,每日都係只會比佢罵...雖然到左今時今日,但係我仲係記住呢件事,我真係好難去忘記佢..... |